A List of Violations (CURA: A Literary Magazine of Art & Action)
After I pled guilty to telecommunications fraud in a Cuyahoga County courtroom, and the judge sentenced me to eighteen months of probation, my lawyer cuffed my arm into his hand and ushered me onto an elevator. “Julie will take care of you. She’s the best probation officer there is,” he said, shifty-eyed and ready to be rid of me. I stared past puffy eyelids at the closing elevator doors, petrified of what was to come.
“You’re gonna be alright,” Probation Officer Julie Fritz assured, not even twenty minutes after my guilty plea. I sat hushed in her court building office chair. Bargain store-flimsy tissue pieces speckled the kohl black eyeliner and mascara that raccooned my eyes. “You had the best judge there is,” she went on, a wide smile and chestnut hair framing her face—Kathy Bates in Misery style. “We had another judge who did time for beating his wife. Nearly killed her. He came out and now he works for the mayor! No, he isn’t making the money he once did. But he’s got a decent living,” she offered all earnest.
My mouth stayed shut.
I thought about the judge’s wife.
“Here are the conditions of your probation,” Fritz said, thrusting a thin solitary sheet my way. “Just sign it and I’ll give you a copy…”
